Influence

For some reason last night it hit me hard. Maybe it’s because Bean is getting older and her personality is starting to bloom, but she’s very much a product of Lili and I and our influence. She’s got her own idiosyncrasies for sure, but mostly she’s a mirror of who we are. It’s wonderful and startling at the same time.

She definitely parrots us a lot, saying the same thing we would say in a certain situation, but it’s more than that. She’s into singing every night and she likes taking walks and going to the coffee shop and even watching PTI with me (yay!). She’s basically becoming a mini version of me in a lot of ways. For now. I’m sure with time that will change and I look forward to her discovering her own interests and pursuits.

It’s incredible, humbling, and kind of scary to think how much influence you have over a living creature. It’s not something I take lightly. One thing (and I wrote about it here) is I’m really conscious of being patient and positive with Bean now. Especially when she’s not really doing anything wrong and it’s me who’s tired or stressed. I’m more calm, more tolerant, more sympathetic and it’s paying huge dividends. Meltdowns still happen, but they are few and far between and have been dramatically reduced in intensity and duration. My thinking is my calm is influencing her calm. It’s amazing to witness. A lesson for both of us really.

One more thing. With Bean being just over three I’m keenly aware it’s now or never to set a good foundation for her to grow up and handle herself (though I’m not really all that worried about that, she’s fierce #GirlPower!). She’s gonna be a remarkable woman. I’m proud to be a small part of helping her become just that.

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